Existing literature regarding survivors of suicide has been based on data from biased samples and/or nonsystematic studies that failed to document the perspective of the survivor. An exploratory field study was conducted in which grounded theory methods were used to answer the question: What do adult survivors report about their perceived life experiences three to nine months after the suicide death of a family member? A sample of 35 subjects was obtained. Subjects' rights as research participants were protected through an approved human subjects' protocol. Methods of data collection included indepth interviews and the use of a bereavement questionnaire. Data from the audiotaped interviews and field notes were analyzed using the constant comparative method. A core variable of "agonizing questioning" was identified as encapsulating the meaning of subjects' life experiences. A theoretical model was developed that described subjects' questioning behavior through experiences of emotional turmoil, cognitive dissonance, physical disturbances, and altered socialization. Survival strategies used by subjects to confront their questions and adjust to their loss were also identified. The questionnaire data were statistically analyzed and compared with the interview data to provide evidence of convergent validity.

Subjects who reported the most painful experiences were those who had no awareness that the deceased was suicidal or who retrospectively could see clues of suicidal intent. Subjects who perceived the victim as chronically suicidal reported experiences that approximated normal bereavement. Evidence of beginning to resolve the loss was apparent among subjects who had achieved some understanding of why the suicide had occurred or recognized that there were no answers to their questions. Subjects emphasized the importance of health professionals being knowledgeable about suicide and its aftermath and sensitive to the concerns of survivors.

The study has implications for nurses and other health professionals, because through better understanding of how survivors of suicide experience their lives, professionals can more effectively meet their needs. Additional research examining the impact of a suicide death on survivors and how survivors' experiences postsuicide may differ from other survivor experiences is recommended.