Curing a cold -- Aurelia's unfortunate young man -- Information for the million -- The killing of Julius Caesar "localized" -- Lucretia Smith's soldier -- A touching story of George Washington's boyhood -- Advice to little girls -- "After" Jenkins -- Answers to correspondents -- Mr. Bloke's item -- A page from a Californian almanac -- The scriptural panoramist -- Among the spirits -- Brief biographical sketch of George Washington -- A complaint about correspondents -- Concerning chambermaids -- Honored as a curiosity -- An inquiry about insurances -- Literature in the dry diggings -- Origin of illustrious men -- The facts concerning the recent resignation -- General Washington's Negro body-servant -- Information wanted -- My late senatorial secretaryship -- An ancient playbill - Back from "Yurrup" -- The Benton House -- A fine old man -- Guying the guides -- Mental photographs -- Rev. Henry Ward Beecher's farm -- The Turkish bath -- The case of George Fisher -- An entertaining article
History repeats itself -- John Chinaman in New York -- The judge's "spirited woman" -- The late Benjamin Franklin -- Map of Paris -- My bloody massacre -- A mysterious visit -- Note on "The petrified man" -- Post-mortem poetry -- Riley - newspaper correspondent -- Running for governor -- To raise poultry -- The undertaker's chat -- The widow's protest -- Wit inspirations of the "two-year-olds" -- About barbers -- A burlesque biography -- The danger of lying in bed -- A fashion item -- First interview with Artemus Ward -- My first literary venture -- A new Beecher church -- Portrait of King William III -- "Blanketing" the Admiral -- A deception -- A genuine Mexican plug -- The great landslide case -- How the author was sold in Newark -- A hundred and ten tin whistles -- Lionizing murderers -- Markiss, king of liars -- Mr. Arkansas -- Nevada nabobs -- What Hank said to Horace Greeley -- When the buffalo climbed a tree -- A curious pleasure excursion -- Rogers -- After-dinner speech
A couple of poems by Twain and Moore -- An encounter with an interviewer -- Johnny Green -- The jumping frog -- The office bore -- "Party cries" in Ireland -- Petition concerning copyright -- The Siamese twins -- Speech at the Scottish banquet in London -- Speech on accident insurance -- The facts concerning the recent carnival of crime in Connecticut -- Letter read at a dinner -- Punch, brothers, punch -- Some rambling notes of an idle excursion -- Speech on the weather -- The Whittier birthday speech -- About magnanimous-incident literature -- O'Shah -- The great revolution in Pitcairn -- Speech on the babies -- American in Europe -- An American party -- Ascending the Riffelberg -- The awful German language -- The great French duel -- The king's encore -- The laborious ant -- My long crawl in the dark -- Nicodemus Dodge -- Skeleton for the Black Forest novel -- A telephonic conversation -- Two works of art -- Why Germans wear spectacles -- Young Cholley Adams -- Plymouth Rock and the Pilgrims
Concerning the American language -- Legend of Sagenfeld in Germany -- On the decay of the art of lying -- Paris notes -- The art of inhumation -- Keelboat talk and manners -- Introduction to "The new guide of the conversation in Portuguese and English" -- A petition to the Queen of England -- A majestic literary fossil -- About all kinds of ships -- A cure for the blues -- The enemy conquered; or, Love triumphant -- Traveling with a reformer -- Private history of the "Jumping frog" story -- Fenimore Cooper's literary offenses -- A hell of a hotel at Maryborough -- The Indian crow -- At the appetite cure -- The Austrian Edison keeping school again -- From the "London Times" of 1904 -- My first lie and how I got out of it -- My boybood dreams -- Amended obituraries -- Does the race of man love a lord? -- Instructions in art -- Italian with grammer -- Italian without a master -- The petrified man -- The Dutch Nick massacre