A laugh-out-loud funny parenting guide from the Honest Toddler, the Internet's most infamous tot, whose unchecked sense of entitlement and undeniable charm on the Honest Toddler blog and on Twitter @HonestToddler have captivated hundreds of thousands of fans online. Are you a confused parent to a toddler? Are you constantly disappointing the small child in your life? Are you tired, stressed out and looking for relief? This book can't help with the last one but it can help you become a better servant/parent to the toddler at the heart of your world. You'll learn about everything from meal preparation (hint: just put the crackers on a plate), play date etiquette (don't touch. Just don't!), to how time outs make you look like a fool. The Honest Toddler says a firm 'NO' to popular, fashionable parenting trends and instead embraces the big questions: Who Does Mommy Belong To? How Can You Prevent Siblings? And Sleep and Weaning Yourself Off it.